Dinner
The evening table: who sits where, who is served first, what is said.
The evening meal is where the strictest table customs tend to live: seating, order of serving, who speaks and who stays silent, what is said before eating. These pages gather those customs, from the Japanese phrases said before and after a meal to the Georgian supra with its toastmaster. For the food itself, see Thali.
Seating and order
Many cultures keep a place for the head of the household, serve guests and elders first, or wait until everyone is seated before anyone lifts a spoon. In some, eating is done by hand from shared dishes with rules about which hand and which side of the plate. In others the order of courses, or of toasts, is as fixed as a ceremony.
Words and silences
Saying grace, a blessing, a thanks to the cook or a call to begin is common worldwide. So are the opposite customs: no talking until the meal ends, no phones, no leaving before the elder rises. Dinner is where children learn what their own community counts as good manners.
Written by the EveryParampara desk with AI assistance. Background on Dinner (meal). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇯🇵 Kyoto, JapanKaiseki懐石
A multi-course Japanese dining tradition shaped by tea ceremonies and the seasonsTable custom · Dinner
🇮🇳 IndiaSadyaസദ്യ
A vegetarian feast from Kerala, served on a banana leaf at Onam, Vishu and weddingsTable custom · Lunch
🇺🇸 United States and 3 moreWedding reception
The party after a wedding, where the couple greet guests over food, cake and dancingFestival · Feasts and festival meals
🇬🇧 London, United Kingdom and 4 moreAfternoon tea
A late-afternoon spread of tea, small sandwiches and cakes, kept across BritainTable custom · Tea-time and snacking customs
🇺🇸 United StatesPotluck
A shared meal where every guest brings a dish, kept by churches, clubs and neighborsTable custom · Dinner
🇨🇦 Canada and 1 moreStag and doe
A Canadian fundraising party for an engaged couple, featuring games, food, and raffles to help pay for the wedding.Festival · Dinner
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Sadya: Augustus Binu / facebook, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Kaiseki: Unknown author, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Wedding reception: Konstantin Makovsky, Public domain, source
- Afternoon tea: joyosity, CC BY 2.0, source
- Potluck: Mack Male, CC BY-SA 2.0, source