Dinner
The evening table: who sits where, who is served first, what is said.
The evening meal is where the strictest table customs tend to live: seating, order of serving, who speaks and who stays silent, what is said before eating. These pages gather those customs, from the Japanese phrases said before and after a meal to the Georgian supra with its toastmaster. For the food itself, see Thali.
Seating and order
Many cultures keep a place for the head of the household, serve guests and elders first, or wait until everyone is seated before anyone lifts a spoon. In some, eating is done by hand from shared dishes with rules about which hand and which side of the plate. In others the order of courses, or of toasts, is as fixed as a ceremony.
Words and silences
Saying grace, a blessing, a thanks to the cook or a call to begin is common worldwide. So are the opposite customs: no talking until the meal ends, no phones, no leaving before the elder rises. Dinner is where children learn what their own community counts as good manners.
Written by the EveryParampara desk with AI assistance. Background on Dinner (meal). Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.
🇲🇽 Mexico and 1 moreTamalada
A gathering where tamales are the main dish or a communal tamale-making party in Mexican and Hispanic cultures.Festival · Lunch
🇺🇸 United StatesFeast of the Seven FishesFesta dei sette pesci
An Italian-American Christmas Eve seafood dinner marking abstinence from meat.Table custom · Dinner
🇺🇸 United States and 1 moreSaint Patrick's Day in the United States
An annual celebration of Irish heritage across America with parades, feasts and green dyeFestival · Dinner
🇺🇸 Raven's Roost, United StatesStomp dance
A ceremonial night dance kept by Eastern Woodland tribes in the United States and Oklahoma.Performance · Dinner
🇺🇸 Washington, United StatesThanksgiving
An annual American holiday of gratitude, family gatherings and an autumn harvest feastFestival · Dinner
🇨🇦 CanadaThanksgivingAction de grâce
An annual Canadian autumn holiday celebrating the harvest with family feastsFestival · Dinner
🇺🇸 United States and 3 moreWedding reception
The party after a wedding, where the couple greet guests over food, cake and dancingFestival · Feasts and festival meals
🇲🇽 Tijuana, Mexico and 1 moreBirria
A rich, seasoned meat stew from western Mexico, cooked for gatherings and holidaysTable custom · Feasts and festival meals
🇺🇸 United StatesPotluck
A shared meal where every guest brings a dish, kept by churches, clubs and neighborsTable custom · Dinner
🇺🇸 United StatesRehearsal dinner
A meal the night before a US wedding, when the wedding party gathers to toast and thankRite of passage · Dinner
🇺🇸 United StatesFestivus
A secular December observance marked by bare poles, voiced grievances, and wrestlingFestival · Dinner
🇨🇦 Canada and 1 moreStag and doe
A Canadian fundraising party for an engaged couple, featuring games, food, and raffles to help pay for the wedding.Festival · Dinner
🇺🇸 Manhattan, United StatesJews and Thanksgiving
An American national holiday kept by most US Jews, and debated by their rabbisFestival · Dinner
Photo credits on this page
The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.
- Thanksgiving: Jennie Augusta Brownscombe, Public domain, source
- Thanksgiving: Lars Plougmann, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Birria: Equipo 9mkt, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Feast of the Seven Fishes: GW Fins, CC BY 2.0, source
- Saint Patrick's Day in the United States: White House/Chuck Kennedy, Public domain, source
- Wedding reception: Konstantin Makovsky, Public domain, source
- Potluck: Mack Male, CC BY-SA 2.0, source
- Jews and Thanksgiving: Executive Committee of Congregation Shearith Israel., Public domain, source
- Festivus: en:User:DRosenbach Original uploader was DRosenbach at en.wikipedia, CC BY-SA 3.0, source
- Tamalada: Tania Solá (WMMX), CC BY-SA 4.0, source