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EveryParampara

Tea, coffee and the drinking ceremony

A cup of tea or coffee is more than a drink.

A cup of tea or coffee is more than a drink. It is a greeting, a pause, a business deal and an act of friendship. Some cultures have shaped it into a ceremony of great beauty, such as the Japanese chanoyu, the Ethiopian coffee ceremony, the Chinese gongfu cha and the Moroccan mint tea. Others have a simple habit with firm rules: a chai at the roadside in India, a flat white in New Zealand, an afternoon tea in England, a cup of kahve in Turkey. This page looks at the drinks, the pots, the order of service and the manners, and what they say about the people who keep them.

What it is for

Sharing tea or coffee marks welcome, respect and rest. It gives a reason to sit together and talk, and a structure for the conversation. In the great ceremonies, the drink is also a path to attention and calm, with every gesture considered. For many cultures it is the first thing offered to a guest, and refusing it can be awkward. The drinks have also shaped social life, from the Ottoman coffeehouse to the English tea garden, and the places where people drink are often places where ideas and friendships grow.

Common elements across cultures

Common features are a special vessel, such as a teapot, jebena, dallah, samovar or tea bowl, a set order of pouring, with the eldest or guest of honour served first, and several rounds. The drink is often prepared in front of the guests, and the host pours with care. Sweet things, such as dates, sugar, biscuits or sweets, often go with it. Many cultures have a rule about how many cups to take, how to hold the cup and how to signal that one has had enough.

Food, dress and music

Tea comes with snacks: scones and sandwiches in England, wagashi sweets in Japan, dim sum in China, samosas and biscuits in India, baklava in Turkey. Coffee comes with dates in Arabia, popcorn in Ethiopia and a glass of water in Turkey. Dress for a formal ceremony may be a kimono, a hanbok or a robe. Music is soft: a lute in a Chinese tea house, a quiet kettle in Japan, or conversation and radio in a cafe. In Morocco and Iran, the pouring itself, the sound of liquid and the clink of glasses, is the music.

How it is changing

Coffee shops and bubble tea have created new rituals worldwide, with fast, take-away, personalised cups. At the same time, interest in traditional ceremony has grown, and tea houses, cuppings and classes are popular. Fair trade and origin labels give drinkers a link to the farmers, and many are choosing high-quality loose leaf and single origin coffees. The old courtesy of offering a drink to a guest remains, and in many places the office tea break and the street chai stall are part of daily life.

Tea, coffee and the drinking ceremony around the world

🇯🇵 Japan

Chanoyu, the way of tea, is a ceremony in which a host whisks powdered matcha and serves it to guests in a quiet tea room, guided by the principles of harmony, respect, purity and tranquillity. A guest bows, admires the bowl, takes the tea in three sips and returns the bowl with thanks.

Read: Japanese tea ceremony

🇨🇳 China

Gongfu cha uses a small Yixing clay teapot and tiny cups, with repeated short infusions and attention to aroma and taste. Offering tea to elders is a sign of respect at weddings.

Read: Gongfu tea

🇮🇳 India

Chai, black tea simmered with milk, sugar and spices, is sold by chaiwallahs at every corner and served in clay cups, kulhads. In Assam and Darjeeling, tea estates have their own traditions.

Masala chai, being written

🇳🇵 Nepal

Sherpa and Tibetan communities drink butter tea, po cha, made with tea, salt and yak butter, which is offered in a wooden cup at a welcome. Chiya, sweet milk tea, is served everywhere.

Read: Butter tea

🇰🇷 Korea

The darye ceremony, with green tea and small cakes, has been revived, and a traditional teahouse serves jujube and citron tea. Barley tea, boricha, is the daily drink.

Read: Korean tea ceremony

🇹🇷 Turkey

Tea in tulip-shaped glasses is served at all hours, and Turkish coffee, brewed in a cezve with grounds, is part of the engagement ritual, with the bride-to-be preparing it for the groom's family. The tea is served from a double kettle, and a guest is offered at least a second glass.

Turkish coffee, being written

Compare all 19 places

Traditions to start with

Also part of it, and being written: Maghrebi mint tea (Moroccan hospitality.), Mate (The shared gourd of South America.).

Questions people ask

What is the difference between a tea ceremony and drinking tea?

A ceremony has a set form, with attention to each action, the utensils and the setting, and its meaning lies in the care. Everyday tea is simpler, but also carries manners of its own.

Why is the guest served first?

Serving the guest or the eldest first shows respect. Pouring order and who holds the pot are important in many cultures.

How many cups should I take?

In Arabia, the host refills until you signal you are done by shaking the cup. In Morocco, three glasses is the custom. In Ethiopia, the three rounds are expected.

Is it rude to refuse a drink?

In many places it can be, so it is best to accept at least a sip. If you cannot, explain politely and thank the host.

Where did tea come from?

Tea was first drunk in China and spread to Japan, Central Asia, Europe and India. Coffee came from Ethiopia and spread through Yemen and the Ottoman Empire.

About this page

Written by the EveryParampara desk with AI assistance. Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.

Tea, coffee and the drinking ceremony on EveryParampara

The traditions written up so far, best known first.

🇨🇳 Yixing, ChinaYixing clay teapot紫砂 Handcrafted Chinese purple clay teapots that season with every brewCraft · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇦🇿 Azerbaijan and 1 moreArmudu tea glassArmudu stəkan A pear-shaped glass used in Azerbaijan to serve and drink black tea.Table custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇰🇼 KuwaitDewaniya An evening gathering and reception central to Kuwaiti social, business, and civic lifeEtiquette · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇨🇳 ChinaGuanxi关系 A Chinese tradition of cultivating trusted networks and reciprocal obligationsEtiquette 🇨🇳 Chaozhou, China and 1 moreGongfu tea工夫茶 A skilled Chinese method of brewing tea in small teaware with precise heat and timingTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇷🇺 Tula, Russia and 3 moreSamovarсамовар A heated urn that brews tea for a slow, sociable pour, from Russia to Iran and KashmirTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇲🇾 Malaysia and 4 moreKopitiam A neighbourhood coffee shop where Southeast Asians share meals, drinks and newsTable custom · Breakfast 🇨🇳 ChinaHong Kong tea culture Morning tea with dim sum and milk tea through the day, in Hong Kong's teahousesTable custom · Breakfast 🇮🇹 Naples, ItalyCaffè Italy's daily coffee habit: espresso taken standing at the bar, and moka coffee at homeTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇮🇹 Naples, Italy and 5 moreCaffè sospeso An anonymous gift of a paid cup of coffee for a stranger in needTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇨🇳 China and 5 moreQingming Festival清明节 A spring custom of sweeping family graves and honouring ancestors across East Asia.Spiritual 🇯🇵 Kyoto, JapanKaiseki懐石 A multi-course Japanese dining tradition shaped by tea ceremonies and the seasonsTable custom · Dinner 🇨🇳 China and 5 moreDouble Ninth Festival重陽節 An autumn festival of mountain walks, chrysanthemum wine and ancestor remembranceSeasonal · Tea-time and snacking customs 🇨🇳 China and 5 moreTea culture How tea is prepared, shared and served, from Chinese tea houses to Tibetan butter teaTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇷🇺 Russia and 1 moreRussian tea culture The everyday cup of Russia, brewed strong and diluted to taste, with jam and sweetsTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇨🇳 Dali, ChinaThird Month Fair三月街 A mountain-foot bazaar, festival, and sports gathering among the Bai in YunnanFestival 🇩🇿 AlgeriaMawlid in Algeriaيوم المولد النبوي The Prophet Muhammad's birthday celebration in Algeria with family feasts and prayersFestival · Feasts and festival meals 🇬🇧 United Kingdom and 5 moreElevenses A short mid-morning pause for a drink and a small bite, kept in many countriesTable custom · Tea-time and snacking customs 🇻🇳 Hội An, VietnamTết Trung Thu節中秋 A mid-autumn festival of lanterns, mooncakes and folklore celebrated across VietnamFestival · Sweets given and shared 🇬🇷 Greece and 1 moreKoulourakiaΚουλουράκια Sweet butter pastries baked for Greek Easter and shaped into rings and braidsTable custom · Sweets given and shared 🇱🇾 LibyaLibyan tea A strong boiled tea in small glasses, served in three foam-topped roundsTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇹🇷 Van, TurkeyTurkish breakfastkahvaltı A long, shared Turkish morning meal of many small dishes, sweet and savoury, with teaTable custom · Breakfast 🇯🇵 Kyoto, JapanJapanese tea ceremony茶道 (Sadō / Chadō), 茶の湯 (Chanoyu) The formal serving of powdered matcha, shaped by Zen, Shinto and wabiTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇨🇳 Lhasa, China and 5 moreButter teaབོད་ཇ་ A salted tea churned with yak butter, served to guests across the HimalayaTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇬🇧 London, United Kingdom and 4 moreAfternoon tea A late-afternoon spread of tea, small sandwiches and cakes, kept across BritainTable custom · Tea-time and snacking customs 🇨🇳 Guangzhou, China and 1 moreDim sum點心 (traditional Chinese), 点心 (simplified Chinese) Small dishes shared with tea, eaten as brunch in Cantonese teahouses and restaurantsTable custom · Breakfast 🇨🇳 China and 5 moreYum cha飲茶 A Cantonese breakfast of dim sum and tea, eaten slowly in large groupsTable custom · Breakfast 🇹🇷 Istanbul, TurkeyTurkish tea culture Two stacked pots, tulip glasses, and a choice of strong or weak tea in TurkeyTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇰🇷 South KoreaKorean tea ceremony다례 (茶禮) Tea served in Korea as a rite of courtesy, now mostly grain and herbal brewsTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇵🇾 Paraguay and 3 moreTereré Paraguay's cold yerba mate drink, passed around in one cup with a metal strawTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇹🇷 Turkey and 5 moreCoffee culture The habits and etiquette of drinking coffee, and the cafés built around itTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇬🇷 GreeceSymposiumσυμπόσιον An ancient Greek post-meal gathering for diluted wine, debate, music and lively gamesTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies

Photo credits on this page

The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.

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