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EveryParampara

Coming of age

Around the world, a young person's step into adulthood is marked by a ceremony.

Around the world, a young person's step into adulthood is marked by a ceremony. It may be a ritual of seclusion and teaching, a religious confirmation, a party, a change of dress or a legal day when new rights begin. The rite tells the young person that they are now expected to carry more responsibility, and tells the community that it must treat them differently. The forms range from the Jewish bar and bat mitzvah to the Latin American quinceanera, the Japanese Seijin no Hi and the long initiation rites of many African and Pacific peoples. Each has its own age, gift and meaning.

What it is for

Becoming an adult is not a single moment, so societies create a day that stands for it. The ceremony gives the young person a role, a new name or new clothes, and gives the family an occasion to say what they hope for. Many rites include teaching about the community's history, faith and responsibilities. In societies without formal schooling, the rite may be the main way that adult knowledge is passed on. For parents it is also a moment to let go and to show the young person off with pride.

Common elements across cultures

Most rites share a few features: a separation from the family or old life, a time of teaching or testing, and a public return in new status. Dress changes, with a first long skirt, a turban, a suit, a kimono or a new hairstyle. Gifts mark the day, often jewellery, books, a watch or money. Elders speak, parents give a blessing, and the whole group feasts. Religious rites often involve a public reading, a vow or a first fast. Girls and boys often have different rites, though in recent years many communities have made them more alike.

Food, dress and music

Food is lavish: a cake, a roast, sweets and the foods of the community. Dress is the centre of attention, from the quinceanera ballgown to the furisode, the long-sleeved kimono, to the white robes of a first communion. Music and dance carry the ceremony, with a waltz for a quinceanera, drumming and song for initiations in Africa, a hora at a bar mitzvah and a dedicated first dance. The photographs taken on the day become family treasures.

How it is changing

Many rites have become more elaborate, with large parties and professional photographers, and some critics say the party now overshadows the meaning. Others are shrinking as boys and girls move away from villages and schools replace initiation. Many communities are now adjusting rites to be equal across genders, or adding community service or learning to the day. Some Indigenous nations are reviving rites that were once banned, with young people seeking out elders to teach them the songs, the language and the responsibilities that go with them.

Coming of age around the world

🇯🇵 Japan

Seijin no Hi, on the second Monday of January, celebrates everyone who turns twenty in the year, many in furisode kimono for women and hakama or suits for men. Local halls hold a ceremony and a party follows.

Read: Coming of Age Day

🇰🇷 South Korea

Seongnyeonui is celebrated on the third Monday of May, with roses, perfume and a gift. Traditional dress, the hanbok, and a tea ceremony remain a part of the older rite.

Read: Coming of Age Day

🇮🇳 India

Upanayana, the sacred thread ceremony, introduces young boys in some Hindu communities to formal study, with the gift of a thread worn over the shoulder. Girls in parts of the south mark the first menstruation with a ritual bath, a feast and new clothes, called ritu kala samskara.

Read: Upanayana

🇱🇰 Sri Lanka

A girl's puberty is traditionally celebrated with a bathing ritual, new clothes and a party with relatives, called the Ottupulla or Raban. The occasion is both private and festive.

Read: Rite of passage

🇮🇱 Israel and the Jewish world

At thirteen for boys, and twelve or thirteen for girls, young people become responsible for the commandments, marked by a bar or bat mitzvah in the synagogue, reading from the Torah and a family celebration. Many families celebrate at the Western Wall in Jerusalem, where young people read from the Torah in the early morning.

Read: Bar and bat mitzvah

🇮🇷 Iran

Zoroastrian children are initiated in the Navjote or Sedreh Pushi at about seven to fifteen years old, when they put on the sacred shirt, the sedreh, and cord, the kusti, in front of a priest and family. A feast of sweet rice and a gift for the child follow, and families wear their best clothes for the occasion.

Navjote, being written

Compare all 19 places

Traditions to start with

Bar and bat mitzvahThe Jewish rite at thirteen.Coming of Age DayJapan's day for new adults.UpanayanaThe Hindu sacred thread ceremony.

Also part of it, and being written: Quinceañera (A girl's fifteenth birthday in Latin America.), Navjote (The Zoroastrian initiation.), Menstruation celebration (An Apache rite for girls.), Land diving (Vanuatu's tower jump.), Debutante (The formal presentation to society.).

Questions people ask

At what age does coming of age take place?

It varies widely: twelve or thirteen for religious rites, fifteen for the quinceanera, eighteen or twenty for civic days. Initiation in some communities happens when the young person is ready.

Do girls and boys have separate rites?

Traditionally yes in many places, but increasingly the rites are shared or made equal. Some communities now hold the same ceremony for both.

Is a coming of age party necessary?

No. Many families keep it simple, with a meal, a gift and a few words. The meaning matters more than the size of the party.

What do rites like this teach?

Often the faith, history and duties of the community, as well as practical skills. The act of facing a test or a public reading also builds confidence.

Are some initiation practices harmful?

Some have been criticised on health grounds. Many communities work with doctors and elders to keep the meaning and make the rite safer, and some have replaced older practices with alternative rites.

About this page

Written by the EveryParampara desk with AI assistance. Customs differ from place to place and family to family. If this is your tradition and we have it wrong, tell us.

Coming of age on EveryParampara

The traditions written up so far, best known first.

RegionSouth AsiaSoutheast AsiaEast AsiaCentral Asia and the CaucasusMiddle EastNorth AfricaSub-Saharan AfricaEuropeNorth AmericaLatin America and the CaribbeanOceania
KindSpiritualFestivalRite of passageTable customSeasonalDressPerformanceEtiquetteCraftGameFolkloreHomeCeremony
MealBreakfastLunchDinnerSupperTea-time and snacking customsTea, coffee and drinking ceremoniesSweets given and sharedFeasts and festival mealsFasting and breaking the fast
🇮🇱 IsraelTallitטלית A four-cornered Jewish prayer shawl with ritual fringes worn during worshipSpiritual 🇦🇺 AustraliaSmoking ceremonyNumbuk Yabbun An Aboriginal Australian ritual of burning native plants to cleanse, heal and welcomeSpiritual 🇳🇬 NigeriaMmanwuMmanwụ An Igbo masquerade tradition invoking ancestral spirits through masked performanceSpiritual 🇺🇬 Uganda and 4 moreBarkcloth Cloth beaten from tree bark across Africa, Asia and the PacificCraft 🇳🇬 Onitsha, NigeriaAgbogho MmuoAgbọghọ Mmụọ An Igbo masked dance celebrating maidenhood and the female spiritPerformance 🇳🇿 Auckland, New ZealandTā moko The traditional permanent tattooing of the Māori people of New Zealand, marking identity and status.Rite of passage 🇵🇭 Cebu, PhilippinesBatok Indigenous Filipino tattooing, once worn as dress, rank and a rite of passageCraft 🇼🇸 Samoa and 1 morePeʻa The traditional Samoan rite of full-body tattooing for men, tapped by master artistsRite of passage 🇵🇬 Maprik, Papua New GuineaHaus Tambaran A sacred house of the Sepik peoples, used for ancestor worship and male initiationSpiritual 🇮🇳 India and 5 moreTribal youth dormitoryMorung A communal house where a tribe's unmarried young people sleep, learn and serveRite of passage 🇪🇬 Egypt and 5 moreTraditional tattooing The ancient custom of marking the skin for protection, healing, status and sacred ritesDress 🇯🇵 Japan and 2 moreKyūdō弓道 The Japanese martial art of archery, practiced with an asymmetrical longbowGame 🇺🇸 United States and 5 moreRite of passage A ceremony that marks leaving one group and entering another, with a new statusRite of passage 🇮🇳 India and 1 moreUpanayanaउपनयन (Sanskrit) A Hindu rite of passage that begins a child's study and marks a second birthRite of passage 🇯🇵 JapanComing of Age Day成人の日 A Japanese public holiday welcoming new adults with municipal rites and celebrationsRite of passage 🇨🇿 Vlčnov, CzechiaRide of the KingsJízda králů A Moravian spring procession where horsemen escort a silent boy king holding a roseFestival 🇷🇺 RussiaScarlet SailsАлые паруса A summer graduation celebration on the Neva River in Saint PetersburgFestival 🇳🇴 Oslo, NorwayRussefeiring A spring graduation rite of passage for Norwegian secondary school studentsRite of passage 🇦🇺 AustraliaWalkabout A rite of passage involving travel through the Australian landscape to learn ancestral lore.Rite of passage 🇬🇭 Odumase Krobo, GhanaDipo An annual Ghanaian coming-of-age ceremony welcoming Krobo girls into womanhoodRite of passage 🇮🇩 IndonesiaSlametan A short communal meal on Java where neighbours share food, prayer and a wish for peaceSpiritual · Feasts and festival meals 🇵🇦 Las Tablas, Panama and 2 morePollera A handmade skirt and outfit worn in Panama, Bolivia and Peru, and a marker of identityDress 🇫🇷 FranceConfirmation A Christian rite of laying on of hands that completes baptism and strengthens faithRite of passage 🇫🇲 Satawal, MicronesiaPwo An initiation that turns students of Caroline Islands wayfinding into navigatorsRite of passage 🇺🇸 United States and 1 moreSweet sixteen A North American coming-of-age celebration marking a sixteenth birthdayRite of passage 🇮🇳 Ahmedabad, India and 1 moreGarbaगर्भ A Gujarati circle dance performed around a sacred flame during the festival of NavratriPerformance 🇲🇲 Yangon, Myanmar and 1 moreShinbyuရှင်ပြု A Burmese Buddhist rite in which a boy goes forth as a novice monk, often at New YearRite of passage 🇨🇳 Beijing, ChinaHanfu漢服 The dress of the Han Chinese, named for the Han dynasty and worn again todayDress 🇳🇴 NorwayBunad Norway's festive dress, tied to a home district and worn from weddings to 17 MayDress 🇮🇳 IndiaVision quest A coming-of-age fast and vigil, kept by some Native American peoplesRite of passage 🇷🇴 Bucharest, Romania and 7 moreHorahoră (Romanian), хоро (Bulgarian), оро (Macedonian), הורה (Hebrew) A circle dance from Southeast Europe, danced at weddings and festivalsPerformance 🇨🇳 Yining, China and 1 moreMeshrepمەشرەپ A Uyghur gathering of music, poetry, dance and moral counsel at harvest and weddingsPerformance 🇮🇱 Jerusalem, Israel and 5 moreBar and bat mitzvahבַּר מִצְוָה / בַּת מִצְוָה A Jewish rite of passage marking when youth reach adulthood and take responsibility for their own actions.Rite of passage · Feasts and festival meals 🇿🇦 South AfricaUlwaluko A Xhosa rite that takes a boy into manhood through seclusion and teachingRite of passage 🇪🇸 Spain and 2 moreLas arras Thirteen gold coins, blessed at a wedding and given by the groom to the brideRite of passage 🇮🇳 Srinagar, India and 3 morePashmina Ultra-fine wool of Himalayan goats, hand-woven in Kashmir into shawls of rankDress 🇺🇸 United StatesGreen Corn CeremonyPuskita A Southeastern harvest and new year ceremony of fasting, dancing and renewalSeasonal 🇬🇧 Yorkshire, United Kingdom and 3 moreMischief NightNoson Ddrygioni (Welsh); Oidhche nan Cleas (Scottish Gaelic) An evening of pranks and tricks, kept before Halloween or Guy Fawkes NightFestival 🇮🇳 India and 2 morePujaपूजा (pūjā) Hindu worship: light, flowers and food offered to a deity or a guestSpiritual 🇬🇷 GreeceSymposiumσυμπόσιον An ancient Greek post-meal gathering for diluted wine, debate, music and lively gamesTable custom · Tea, coffee and drinking ceremonies 🇬🇷 Olympia, GreeceHeraean Games An ancient Greek festival of running races for unmarried young women at OlympiaGame 🇵🇭 Philippines and 5 moreFirst Communion A Christian rite of passage marking a person's initial reception of the Eucharist.Rite of passage 🇦🇫 Kabul, AfghanistanBacha poshباشا بوش / بچه‌ پوشی An Afghan custom of dressing and raising a daughter as a sonHome 🇬🇧 United Kingdom and 2 moreShoe throwing The act of hurling footwear for sport, wedding luck, protest or overhead display.Folklore 🇮🇳 Varanasi, IndiaHead shaving in Hinduism Ritual tonsure for spiritual renewal, life transitions, and devotion in HinduismSpiritual 🇺🇸 United States and 4 moreLine-crossing ceremony A naval initiation rite marking a sailor's first voyage across the equatorRite of passage 🇺🇸 United StatesRumspringaRumshpringa An adolescent period of courtship and social exploration in Amish communities.Rite of passage 🇮🇳 IndiaRitu Kala SamskaramRitushuddhi A South Indian Hindu coming-of-age ceremony for girls after their first period.Rite of passage
More traditions

Photo credits on this page

The small pictures above come from Wikimedia Commons under free licences. Some are cropped to fit.

The weekly EveryParampara

Every week: one tradition from somewhere new, what is being celebrated around the world this week, and one idea explained.